Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
