i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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