I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
