They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
