i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
