At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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