i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
You smell like stripper and shame
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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