this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
