I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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