Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize