this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
