She said her name was "party"
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
