is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
