did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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