I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
