I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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