How'd it feel making her break her religion?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize