Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
