I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
