Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
