I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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