ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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