Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
