glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
