She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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