she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We are all done wearing pants today
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
