Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
