Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
