sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Can you bring me the toilet please
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
