Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
