he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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