so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
