Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize
