ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I understand Curling. That high.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize