i just google imaged poop.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She even gives head with a lisp.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
