Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
