you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
