If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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