I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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