wanna go halves on a baby?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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