PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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