Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Randomize
