A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
