guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
