Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
