But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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