Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
