But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
