Porn is love you can see.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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