OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
