Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Randomize
