How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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